The Mirror of Parenthood: Reflections That Shape Tomorrow

Sailors,
As my daughter shifts into adulthood, and my son still a little .... I have been reflecting. I came across this saying and it resonated.

When our children are little, they see the very best in us. To them, we are everything good and proper. They believe our words, excuse our shortcomings and learn to shape themselves around our behavior and expectations. Their love and forgiveness flow without condition.

But kids grow up. And as they grow older, their view widens. They begin to notice how we treat ourselves and others, and that quietly teaches them how to engage with the world both within and outside of them. When they begin to date, they look back on us as models of partnership. And when they step into parenthood, they revisit their own childhood with wiser eyes. Through every experience they live as their own - their perspective of us shifts.



You see, the truth is, and this is hard to swallow for a lot of aging parents... in the eyes of a child, we can paint any story we want to, but as they grow, they learn to read us in their own. They decide for themselves what kind of person we are, what kind of partner we are, and what kind of parent we were to them through their eyes.

What I am learning is...... it's not only the image we maintain in their earlier years of childhood that matter. It's the lifetime of lessons that last with them as they carry us with them into their own lives.

So, the question is, are we teaching our children lessons worth carrying, or are we leaving them with patterns they will spend years trying to unlearn? It's easy for us to shine in the eyes of a child who doesn't know the difference.... but one day, we will have to face the mirror they've become.

Signed,
-Just a messy mom in her kitchen